To whom reads this.
I am(was) at stay at home mom, my kids are 3 and 18 months. Married for 5 years. Came in the US for him, lived in Germany, I had a job,a place, everything.
Marriage was bad, constantly belittled, criticized, humiliated,threats of taking my children from him and his family,wasn't allowed to have opinions or options..like I wanted to work or go to college, he wouldn't support me. Financially abused..
In January I did a mistake of going out with friends, got super drunk (first time in 5 years) got in a fight with him over the phone, got home, police were called (don't know why) they end up leaving. After, his sister got verbally abusive towards me talking in my face, he was behind me, blocking the door, I felt intimidated and ganged up on, I turned and I gave him an open palm push to the chest. He called the cops again, and I got arrested with domestic violence. Because I was drunk, I had to spend the night in a sobbering cell.
The next day I go home, late afternoon he comes home and serves me a temporary protective order, ordering me to leave the house,temporary custody of the kids, no car, no money, just some clothes. Also thanks me for cleaning up and hugs me..
His aunt paied me a room at a hotel, where I stayed for 2 weeks until our first hearing took place. I retained a lawyer by pawning jewelry, my lawyer wanted to extend the order for a few weeks bc we wanted to see what the "settlement letter" my soon to be ex offers..he wants sole custody, he offers me $10.000 and a old car.
Of course, I didn't signed anything, got him to keep my phone line open and to give me a car (we have 3 in total) he signed a check of $500 saying "settlement allowance "- which I can't cash it like that.
Now, it is February...he also pressed charges of assault..he didn't showed up in court..the whole thing got continued. I have found a full time job and trying to see my children but he won't allow more then 2 or 3 hours here and there with his mother supervision.
Second time we went to court for the protective order..he wanted me to sign some kind of conviction for 6 months where he gets the children and I can have visitations every other weekend. My lawyer decided to ask the court for another extension for a few weeks bc we wanted to wait out and see if the assault charges were dropped -but he didn't show to that ,so now we are not really going any further.
My lawyer thinks we should file for divorce on grounds of constructive desertion. It is terrible what this man is doing to me. I am staying with a friend now..but honestly I don't know how to go on.
Help me, any advice...scared he will take my children away for good.